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“There’s a storm coming tonight,” he told her. “It’s supposed to be real bad. Why don’t you let me drive you?”
She chuckled and her breath plumed out in front of her in a white screen. “That makes no sense. There’s no storm now so if you drive me, I’d be stuck at the shop when the storm hits. Who’s going to drive me home?”
He mulled over her logic and huffed. “I hate your fucking car.”
Calla laughed at the familiar agitation darkening his scowl. “I know, but it’s the only one I have, so…”
“Get another one!” he snapped. “That tiny piece of crap isn’t safe, especially during the winter.”
“It’s fine,” she assured him as she had a million times before. “I’m not staying long. I just want to make sure Mom’s okay.”
He looked like he was prepared to argue, but she was already turning away and making her way to the object of his fury. Her keys jingled in the wintery silence as she flipped to the right one.
The inside was cold. The leather was crisp beneath her. She gritted her teeth to keep them from chattering as she got the engine started. In the halos of her headlights, Jared’s dark silhouette seemed larger than life a few feet away. He was watching her with his hands on his hips and his feet shoulder width apart. The irritation was a neon sign across his face. Finally, he gave up his showdown with her car and ambled to the massive gray truck parked off to the side. She watched the several tons of metal and machine bow to his weight when he heaved himself into the driver’s side. The door slammed shut behind him and the taillights splashed crimson stains across the snow. His window wheeled down and he thrust out an arm. He waved her on ahead of him.
Her tiny car grumbled in protest as the snow mounds grew higher than the frame. The roads that far out of town were seldom ever plowed. Most normal people bought trucks for that purpose, to avoid getting stuck. Her car was illogical, as Jared constantly reminded her.
“It’s death waiting to happen!”
His concern was endearing and sometimes amusing. She liked her car. It was the first big item she’d bought as an adult. She was proud of it. But, if she were honest with herself, she really needed a bigger car. At least for the winter months. Not that she would ever tell him.
Jared followed her all the way to the outskirts of town, completely out of his way, just to where the snowplows had done their job. He did a U-turn and drove back once she was safely on clear pavement. Calla watched his taillights disappear from sight through her rearview mirror and felt the familiar pang of loneliness in her chest. She hated that he brought it out in her when she fought so hard to keep it suppressed. It hadn’t done her any good in the past. It was that singular feeling that had destroyed her in the first place. She could never allow it to bloom again.
Bottling it back up, she steered her way to the heart of town and the only reason for her sanity.
The shop was brightly lit when Calla reached her usual parking spot in front. The bay windows shone in the setting gloom, giving the place a warm glow. Willa had stapled fairy lights around the glass, framing the mannequins in their pretty outfits and it only further drew the eyes when dusk fell.
The sign over the door swayed with the wind. The chains creaked in the silence as Calla cut the engine and stepped onto the sidewalk. A few people spotted her and waved. She waved back before ducking inside just as the first sprinkle of snow began falling from the inky heavens.
Her mom was behind the gleaming glass counter tucked just beneath the window. Her sleek, blonde hair was pulled back in a pretty French braid that Willa must have done for her. It left her small, round face bare and made her seem remarkably young. Her blue eyes lifted and widened in surprise when she spotted Calla.
“Hey sweetheart.” She lowered her head back to the photo album she was organizing. “I didn’t know you were coming.”
Stomping the snow off her boots onto the mat, Calla shrugged. “I didn’t either.”
Her mom stopped her rifling and looked up again. “Something wrong?”
It took her a moment to answer. She stalled by unhooking the buttons on her coat and shrugging out of the heavy wool. She walked around the counter and speared the coat up next to her mother’s fiery red one.
“No.”
“Calla.” Her mom straightened and folded her arms. “Talk to me.”
“It’s nothing!” She insisted, turning away and marching deeper through the maze of clothes.
There weren’t many. They carried a very small selection of each item, two or three at the most. Not because they didn’t have the room or cliental for it, but it made each article feel like one of a kind and that was what drew people; everyone wanted to be the only one in town with that pair of shoes, or that purse. Women were selfish like that and it was what kept Libellule in business.
“Was Jared at the house again?”
Calla straightened a row of skinny jeans, putting one finger width of spaces between each hanger.
“Yeah.”
“Did you talk to him?”
“No!” she grumbled, voice dripping with agitated sarcasm. “I ignored him and crawled under the table.”
“You know what I mean.”
She did know.
“He’s seeing someone,” she mumbled. “There’s nothing for me to say to him.” She scowled at a t-rack of cashmere sweaters in soft pastel colors. “I don’t have anything to say to him even if he wasn’t.”
“If you’re worried he might not love you back—”
“That’s not it.” Calla turned away from the sweaters to face her mom. “I know he does.”
Hadn’t he been telling her as much since they’d been sixteen? She hadn’t believed him then, not until the day she returned a year ago, a ruined shell of the girl she used to be and saw it in his eyes. It was too late then.
“So what’s the problem?”
What was the problem? That was the million dollar question. There were days she knew the answer and days when it made no sense even to her. But one thing was always for sure: a guy like Jared deserved someone who wasn’t broken. And that was an answer she couldn’t give her mother. It was a secret Calla would take to her grave.
Chapter Two ~ Jared
It was snowing. Fluffy white flakes swirled to the ground in a flurry, like a child twirling the artificial snow inside a snow globe and making the sparkles spin. Against the black backdrop, it seemed infinitely too bright and endless. The cold frosted the windows of the steakhouse and splintered along the glass like claws trying to get in. Despite the muggy heat sprinkled with the scent of tangy BBQ sauce, fried meat, and steamed vegetables, the chill was unmistakable. But all he could think about was Calla and whether or not she made it home.
“Jared?”
Across from him, her face illuminated by the soft, yellow light dangling over their table, Denise studied him. Her blue eyes appeared oddly black in the shadows, but the concern in them was discernable.
“Sorry.”
He tried to focus … again, but the task was becoming increasingly harder with every minute the storm continued. He couldn’t seem to get the image of Calla in that stupid piece of shit she called a car out of his head. It was always followed by the thought of her careening off the road and headlong into a ditch, hitting her head, and dying of exposure before anyone found her. That was always quickly shoved aside with the reminder that town was a mere fifteen minutes away from her apartment and someone was bound to come across her. But what if it wasn’t quick enough? What if she was hit by a transport and killed? What if…
“Jared!”
He sucked in a sharp breath as that last terror gripped around his chest with serrated fingers. “Yeah, I’m here. Sorry.”
“Are you sure?” Denise chuckled warily. “You seem about a million miles away.”
“No.” He rubbed a hand over his face. “I’m here. I was just thinking about the roads.”
Denise glanced at the window and watched as winter pummeled them with yet
another wave of snow. The wind howled, reminding Jared of demons. Between that and the blizzard slamming into the glass, he couldn’t be sure this wasn’t the beginning of some horror movie.
She sighed. “It’s getting pretty bad, huh?”
Jared inhaled deeply, trying to cram as much air into his system as possible to ward back the building anxiety threatening to propel him into a panic attack.
“Yeah…” The breathing didn’t help. “How was your day?”
Denise shrugged a smooth, bare shoulder where her knitted sweater had slid off the smooth slope. Her long, dark hair shimmered in the dull light and long, silver earrings glittered. She brushed a hand through the silky strands, pushing them back from her face and tucking them behind one ear. The gesture was fluid and graceful.
“Uneventful,” she said at last. “My days off usually are, I guess. I sort of just stayed at home and cleaned.” She raised a finely plucked eyebrow in genuine interest. “What about you? How was work?”
His job was how they’d met. Denise was moving out of her ex-boyfriend’s house. She found him leaning against the side of the house during his break and asked if he had a smoke. He didn’t, because he didn’t smoke. But she stayed and somehow he wound up asking her to dinner. That was six weeks ago. Since then, they’d spent one night together. It had been nice, but it hadn’t driven him to want more, which wasn’t Denise’s fault. She had been passionate and wonderful, but it wasn’t fair to her that another woman kept jumping between them. It was his fault. He was trying so hard to accomplish something apparently impossible and it just wasn’t working. Maybe he was meant to suffer in hell for the rest of his life. Maybe Calla was his eternal torment. He’d certainly fucking tried to move on and no matter what he did, she pulled him right back in.
“Jar?”
He’d done it again.
“I’m really sorry, Denise.” For more than she would ever know. “I think I should take you home.”
Denise blinked and jerked back a fraction. “But we haven’t even eaten…”
“I know.” He was already sliding out of the booth. “But I don’t think—”
“Don’t.” It was his turn to blink in surprise. She was staring hard at the table between them, her smile gone. “Don’t do that here.”
Without another word, she climbed out of the booth and grabbed her coat. Jared didn’t ask her what was the matter, or what she was talking about. He wasn’t stupid, and neither was she. He dropped money down on the table for the food they hadn’t even received yet and reached for Denise’s hand. She pulled away and he didn’t push.
At his truck, he helped her into the passenger’s side seat and circled around to get in behind the wheel. His keys sounded ridiculously loud in the deafening silence as he fished them from his pocket and drove them into the ignition.
The drive back took less than twenty minutes and only because he had driven there like the devil himself were on their tail. It was stupid and reckless, but he honestly couldn’t get there fast enough.
“This isn’t the way to my apartment,” Denise murmured, watching the buildings blur by.
“I need to make a stop.”
Calla’s shop was the only one still open when he swerved into the empty spot next to Lily’s black Mustang. Calla’s bug was nowhere to be seen and that only escalated the disquiet in his gut.
“Wait for me,” he told the puzzled woman next to him. “I’ll be a minute.”
Shoving open his door to the blistering cold, Jared leaped out. The door slamming shut resounded through the empty streets. It was followed by the hurried crunch of his boots as he jogged to the shop. Lily’s head jerked up when he threw the door open with a little more force than was necessary.
“Jared?”
His gaze swung over the neatly kempt space, not really touching on anything, but knowing instinctively she wasn’t there.
“Is Calla still here?”
Lily frowned. “No, she left about ten minutes ago. Why?” She shut the album she was working on. “Is something wrong?”
The stubble on his chin scratched his fingertips when he rubbed at his jaw. “The snow’s coming down pretty hard and I fucking hate that piece of shit she drives.” He winced when Lily’s dainty brow lifted. “Excuse my language.”
There was a glimmer of something in the woman’s eyes, but her face remained perfectly neutral.
“She should be home by now.”
Jared nodded. “Maybe.” He drew in a breath filled with the scent of lavender and cleaner. “I’ll drive by and make sure.” He started to leave when another thought occurred to him. “Can I drive you home, Mrs. McClain? No offense to your car, but it would really put my mind at ease. I’ll even come by tomorrow morning to pick you up and bring you back.”
Lily smiled and Jared could see why Sloan had fallen so hard for her. She was a beautiful woman, small and delicate, but strong in a way that reminded him of Calla.
“You’re very sweet, Jared. But I’m all right. I’ve driven through worse in that car.”
“Please,” he pressed. “I insist.”
She eyed him, and for a moment he was sure she was going to refuse again. But her head bobbed once, making the light overhead catch the silky, blonde strands woven along the back of her head.
“All right. Let me grab my things.”
He waited with near patience as she closed the shop down and followed him to the truck. He opened the backdoor for her and helped her up into the warm cabin. She was buckling her belt when he slid in behind the wheel.
Denise met his gaze in the dim light, her eyes filled with confusion, and he felt a stab of guilt.
“I need to make a quick drive by Calla’s place.” He fastened his own belt. “I just want to make sure she got home all right.”
Denise shrugged, but said nothing.
They pulled out in silence. Rubber ground over snow as they maneuvered out of town. The roads could have been empty of other cars, or people. But the absolute whiteout made it impossible to be sure. It also forced him to drive at a near snail’s pace to avoid hitting anyone, or driving off the road. His window wipers squeaked against the glass in rapid sweeps, but all he could make out was just the hood of his truck.
“Hello Denise,” Lily broke the quiet.
“Hello Mrs. McClain,” Denise murmured.
“How was your date?”
“We didn’t have one,” Denise stated bluntly.
Jared didn’t miss the implication, or the displeasure in her tone. He knew he should explain, but what the hell was he supposed to say? The way he felt about Calla, he couldn’t even explain it to himself. It wasn’t right, or fair, not to him, not to Calla and sure as hell not to Denise. But Calla had always been his weakness. Ever since they were kids. The fire and life in her always made him want to draw closer, to feel it on his skin, to bask in it. Then she’d gone to school and returned a completely different person. The fire was there. It reared its head sometimes, but it was always quick and then gone. He didn’t know what had happened to her in the two years she was gone, but the part of him she had taken with her was never returned.
“Jared!”
Lily’s alarmed gasp drove his foot down hard on the brake. The tires growled as they fishtailed ever so slightly on the road before coming to a jerking halt. His heart continued to roar even though they were at a complete stop.
“There!”
Lily leaned between his and Denise’s seats and pointed out the windshield, not that she had to. Even in the obscurity, it was impossible to miss the twin beams of light piercing through the darkness, shooting towards the sky.
His heart slammed into his stomach.
“No…”
The tension in his voice echoed in the grip he had around the wheel. In his chest, his lungs constricted, pleading for him to breathe. But he couldn’t. He could scarcely think as he rolled over onto the shoulder and leaped out of the car.
“Call for help,” was all he could think to tell Lily
, who was already struggling with her belt. “Stay in the car.”
He slammed the door shut and sprinted to where he could just make out the faint outline of a car. It must have spun on the road, because it was facing the opposite direction with its butt in the ditch and its nose jutting out. Ice spiked him in the eyes, blinding him to the make or model. He forced an arm up to shield his face as he jogged to where the car rose out of the bank like a great, white shark. The wide front was the first thing he saw and he felt momentarily terrible at the relief that washed over him. A relief that nearly sent him to his knees.
Not Calla.
Exhaling and inhaling deeply, he pushed forward.
“Hey!” he called over the screaming winds. “Anyone in there?”
The driver’s side door opened and a head poked out.
“Yes!”
Jared edged around the side, making his way carefully down the incline. “Is anyone hurt?”
“No, we’re okay.” The woman was as stark white as the snow around her. Tendrils of blonde fluttering around her ashen cheeks from beneath the wool cap pulled low around her ears. He tried not to think how the color matched Calla’s. “We hit a patch of ice and slid.”
“Is someone coming?” Jared joined her and peered inside the car at the tiny face staring back at him from the backseat.
The woman shook her head. “My phone is dead. We were on our way home. My husband’s out of town.”
Jared nodded. “Why don’t we get you guys out of this cold and then we’ll call someone to come get your car?”
Agreeing gratefully, the woman, with Jared’s help, pulled the boy out of the backseat, grabbed their bags, and followed him to the truck.
Lily scooted over as the group climbed into the back with her. Jared pulled out an old blanket he kept under the bench and wrapped it around the kid.
“Okay?” he asked.
The kid, maybe nine or ten, nodded and dragged the blanket closer.
Giving his knee a quick pat, he raised his head to the mother. “I have to make one stop, but I’ll take you guys home right after, if that’s okay?”